Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Chica-BOOOOOM

It seems that the girls in Central America follow the classic latin mould.

There are those with the most beautiful faces, but sadly with bodies that well the less said the better.
There are your classic BOBFOCs (body off baywatch face off crimewatch).
Then there is the rare 1% of latino angels, who've got the lot, girls with long tanned limbs, hair so glossy and black it shines, a caual air, natural grace, and....what's that ticking...tick.tick.tick.
They are biological time bombs... it may not be today, it may not be tomorrow but one day and probably one day soon, the diet of rice and beans or cheese tortillas (quesillo) is going to take its toll and BOOOOM they burst into a fully grown size 20 latin momma. because lets face it there isn't a single woman over 30 in the continent who can tie her own shoelaces.

You give me the HORN

Some insights I still recall from recent holiday in Central America.

Rules of the road.

i) the road is long, and your vehicle is slow so relieve the boredom by:
  • driving on the wrong side of the road (who said there is a right side to the road? Squares!!!)
  • overtake other vehicles at improbable places
  • drive alongside your friends and shout at them
  • honk at ladies on the roadside
ii) use of horn. It is very important that you only use your horn to indicate the following:
  • I am about to overtake you
  • It is safe to overtake me
  • It is not safe to overtake me
  • You better not overtake me
  • or I'll run you off the road
  • Its my birthday
  • Its your birthday
  • Its someone's birthday, surely
  • My horn isn't working
  • oh wait a minute yes it is

needless to say with so much to convey with a single beeeep! driving around central america is a very noisy experience.

Amusingly a sign in the bus in Costa Rica read: It is forbidden to discuss politics, religion or social issues on this bus. "nice weather we are having!"